August 30, 2009
Fixing A Marriage
Each year I spend one weekend working on a retreat experience for couples whose marriages are in trouble. One of the most heartbreaking experiences is when a couple begins to give up hope of remaining married because they have drifted apart or because of some serious destructive behavior on the part of one or both of the marriage partners,
In the past, there wasn’t a lot a couple could do to begin again. Well meaning family members would intervene -- or interfere. Marriage counselling worked for some, but seemed to speed up a split for others. There wasn’t a safe, guided experience for a couple to rediscover whether they could work through their difficulties and live out the “happily ever after” they had hoped for at the start of their marriage.
Now there is a rediscovery weekend. It’s called Retrouvaille. (This is the French word for “rediscovery” and it’s pronounced retro-veye.) The weekend was first designed in Canada and is now offered throughout the world. It is also offered several times a year on Long Island and I’ll be involved in the weekend of September 11-13. The weekend starts on Friday night and concludes on Sunday late in the afternoon. It takes place in a retreat center and it allows couples to focus on each other without the distractions of family or work. It is completely private -- no couple is asked to talk about their situation with others. There is a series of guided workshops led by team couples and a priest that let couples reflect on their marriage and communicate with one another better.
If your marriage is in some kind of trouble -- maybe there are some small issues that you keep putting on the back burner with the hope that they’ll go away some day -- maybe there’s something quite devastating that is ripping the heart out of you -- this weekend is time well spent. There are still some openings on the upcoming weekend, so I urge you to talk with each other about attending. If the dates are not good for you, there are future weekends available. Now would be a good time to deal with one of the most important aspects to your life.
Check it out online: www.retrouvaille.org or call 800-470-2230. If you’d like to chat with someone about this, our local contact couple John & Linda Pisano can be reached at 334-0178.
